My Husband's Critiques

A few weeks ago I totally woke up on the wrong side of the bed.

I did my usual routine but without my usual upbeat attitude.

When I got home from dropping Luna off at preschool my husband acknowledged my wrong side of the bed wake up situation and said something to the effect of “you were mean to Luna.”

I literally laughed it off and went about my day. Didn’t think of it again.

Why? Because I didn’t believe him.

No part of me believed him. I knew I hadn’t been mean at all.

A few days after that, my husband (sorry babe, this is kind of a throw your husband under the bus blog) mentioned in passing that he thought I had a lead foot.

I was all over him. No I don’t. Why would you say that? I probably then critiqued his driving. Defensive was an understatement.

This time I did not laugh it off, did not just go about my day.

Why? Because part of me believed him.

When I step back, he is totally right. I do kind of have a lead foot.

Isn’t that so funny and backwards?

I felt the need to defend myself against something that part of me agrees with. But when I totally disagree and know in my bones who I am and how I acted I can just let it go.

Usually when someone “triggers” us it is because deep down we believe them on some level. And this is where the fun inner work for us begins.

Who triggers you? What do they say or think? And, most importantly how are they right?