I hate being pregnant

I liked and sometimes even loved being pregnant with my first baby.

I figured I would at least like it this time around.

However, I was/ am dealing with morning sickness and not being able to walk very well because of SI pain and so tired that screen time and snacks became my go to parenting style for my toddler (cue the mom guilt).

So, I have been off and on miserable.

BUT, I was mostly miserable because I thought I shouldn’t be miserable.

I thought I should like this.

I thought it is such a blessing how dare I not like this.

In the grand scheme of things what I am dealing with is like no big deal.

It was like, what is wrong with you, Laura? I was trying to force myself to like it.

And then one day I just decided point blank, I don’t like being pregnant this time.

FREEDOM. TOTAL FREEDOM.

I don’t like being pregnant and that is completely okay.

It doesn’t make me a bad mom.

It doesn’t make me ungrateful for this little miralce baby.

It doesn’t make me love this baby any less.

In fact when I can just accept that I don’t like this pregnancy there is so much more space.

More space for truth, more space for loving this baby I am growing.

And it is so counterintuitive but it is like now that I have accepted it, it is really not that bad.

What are you pretending you like? Or beating yourself up because you don’t like it? What can you tell yourself the truth about?